Filed under Politicking

Guido in “Nazi” shock

Sunny has found an old Guardian article saying that Paul Staines, who now blogs as Guido Fawkes, plotted an alliance with the BNP to intimidate lefties when he was in the Federation of Conservative Students.

Mr Staines and his sockpuppets have infested the comments, claiming that the Guardian retracted the story (which is doubtless why the article, and not the retraction, is still available on Lexis-Nexis). But even if it’s false, it remains entirely clear that Mr Staines was a member of the incredibly-right-wing-and-mad FCS, and therefore should be eviscerated and have his corpse pissed on anyway.

Special message for idiots

Are you the kind of cunt who likes to spout lying racist nonsense about ‘bogus’ asylum seekers? Does the government cravenly pander to your stupid views?

If so, you are personally responsible for the death of Abdullah Tokhi. Nice one, you.

The Lord of Sarcasm

We like Lord Lee of Trafford:

The Liberal Democrat peer, Lord Lee of Trafford, also backed the amendment: “It is our contention that protecting the police from action under this bill can only add to mistrust, to cynicism and suspicion. I am surprised that the normal light sensitive touch, which the home secretary normally displays, seems to have deserted him on this occasion.”

Unrelatedly, we also like Charlie Brooker.

Isn’t this what the War on Terror is about?

The fact that Capita, administrator of the London congestion charge, has been attacked by a letter bomb proves beyond reasonable doubt that car drivers (or, as we like to call them, Kar-animals) are a threat to western society and must be wiped out.

If moderate members of the car-driving community (assuming such a creature can exist) do not immediately condemn the blast, denounce the car-worshipping, lawbreaking culture that led to it taking place, and grass up the culprits to the police, they should be deported or executed.

A brief note on anti-Americanism

Hating individual people from the US for their nationality is wrong.

Hating the US itself, its actions overseas over the last 200 years [*], the evil bastards who run it, its belief that it’s a force for good, and its belief that it can do anything it likes anywhere it likes to pursue these ‘good’ aims, is entirely right, proper and sensible.

If I met someone who was anti-American in the first sense, I’d think they were a cunt. The same would be true for anyone who wasn’t anti-American in the second sense.

[*] partial exception granted for its reluctant and delayed intervention in Europe 1941-45.

PDF 1, Reid 0

I’m reminded by Obsolete of the universally reviled John Reid’s scaremongering prediction that terrorists would ruin Christmas.

Irritatingly, I can’t find the post where I offered a £100 bet to all comers that this absolutely wasn’t going to happen. But I’m fairly sure I actually did. Sadly, even the crazy people who believe in the ‘terror threat’ weren’t willing to put the money up, so being right hasn’t actually brought me any real benefits.

‘Twas ever so…

Perhaps the most apt thing he’s ever said

Stephen at Unspeak makes a valiant attempt at translating George Bush’s recent speech into English. The highlight:

“We go forward with trust that the Author of Liberty will guide us through these trying hours.”

Translation: God help us.

It’s funny, and/or terrifying, because it’s true.

Not Ruth-less enough

Neither the government, nor Ruth Kelly herself are handling her “disabled child at private school situation” well, either on a moral or a political level.

On a personal level, I respect Ms Kelly’s decision to do what she feels is the best for her disabled son. However, this does not make it appropriate for her to send her child to an independent school while remaining the government minister for education – given that this proves beyond any doubt that she does not believe the system you are running is capable of providing her child with the education that he needs.

In any line of business, refusing to use your own product shows that you are happy to inflict it on others while being fully aware that it is poor. Being minister for education, as it is conventionally understood, involves not admitting that the education system is poor. On this basis, Ruth Kelly has no alternative but to resign, and anyone seeking to defend her on the basis that she’s doing the best for her family in a hard situation should have the knee-jerk sympathy beaten out of them with an iron bar.

However, shifting the goalposts a little, there is one way in which Ms Kelly could keep her job: if she publicly admitted that the education system does not adequately provide for the parents of children disabled in whichever way her son is disabled; announced the steps that her department was going to take to address these flaws in the system; and announced a date when the system would be sufficiently fixed to regain her own personal confidence. Sadly, this involves concrete policies, personal responsibility and admission of culpability, and therefore will never happen.

Meanwhile, David Cameron is absolutely cleaning up – unlike me, he can profit massively from the situation while not even having to criticise Ms Kelly. “We all have to make the decisions as parents first, not as politicians. Ruth Kelly is a parent first and foremost“, he says, while the papers do the job of pointing out the context that Mr Cameron has a disabled child who attends a state school.

Mr Cameron is an ex-PR man, and therefore definitionally unscrupulous and untrustworthy. I think it would be pushing it to suggest that he had his child deliberately disabled for political advantage, however. Also, fuck, this bastard is going to win, isn’t he?

Update: Tampon Teabag makes the above paragraph look inoffensive.

You lame bunch of losers

This is all your fucking fault:

We are sorry to have to inform you that the pledge to which you signed up did not meet its target in the required time. It required 3,000,000 people, but achieved only 662.

The pledge, created by Stef, read: ‘I will refuse to register for an ID card but only if 3,000,000 people will sign up.’

This means you don’t have to do your part of the pledge. Instead, why not sign up to local alerts at http://www.en-gb.pledgebank.com/alert to find out when someone creates a new pledge near you, browse the pledges at http://www.en-gb.pledgebank.com/list or perhaps make your own pledge.

Yes, of course I was one of the 662. And you?

At least our press doesn’t have a monopoly on ‘terror’ stupidity

My eyes are drawn to an amazingly ignorant article on ABC News inspired by John Reid’s paranoid ravings, picking up and running with the whole “we’ll be lucky not be be blown up by Boxing Day” meme. A bet that I’ve already offered to one wingnut, and will quite happily offer to anyone else willing to take it, is £1000 that there will be no terrorist attack on the UK over the Christmas/New Year season.

Why am I so confident? Simply because the article says things which are clearly and demonstrably false about the August aeroplane bomb plot in order to make us more scared – and therefore it’s reasonable to assume it’s doing the same thing about the Evil Muslim Conspiracy To Ruin Christmas (“maybe if we’d called it Winterval instead they’d’ve left us alone”, etc).
Specifically, he suggests that the August bomb plot was a serious threat, expertly planned with direction from Pakistan, and featuring people of great technical knowledge.

Back in the real world, it’s been conclusively demonstrated that the bomb plot could never have worked, and the alleged mastermind in Pakistan has been acquitted of all terror charges. In short, the facts fit very well with the “lack of professionalism in planning that are often the hallmarks of what are commonly called homegrown plots”.

If that’s indicative of the quality of this bloke’s ‘facts’, I think my grand is pretty safe, don’t you?