“It’s antisemitic to say that Israel is an apartheid state. The fact that Israel meets the internationally recognised definition of an apartheid state is irrelevant, because when you say ‘apartheid state’, that makes people think of South Africa, which did bad apartheid and not the lovely fluffy bunny good apartheid that Israel does.”
Shorter shorter Eric Lee: “You antisemites can prove anything with facts.”
Popularity: 34% [?]
Excellently, Channel 4 is getting the Iranian president, Mr I’m A Dinner Jacket, to present its Alternative Christmas Message.
Now, we all know Mr Jacket is a loony. So opinions on the matter will be split broadly into ‘people who know Mr Jacket is a loony but think it’s fucking hilarious’, ‘people who know Mr Jacket is a loony but don’t give a fuck either way’, and ‘utter cunts who’ll get wound up by Channel 4 giving a PLATFORM!!! to this EVIL!!! HOLOCAUST DENYING!!! ANTISEMITIC!!!…etc’.
The Guardian piece linked above has a nice selection of the final group, exemplified by:
Incredible that they wouldn’t dream of George Bush (senior or junior) giving the address (thank goodness) so why go to this ridiculous extreme? A religious bigot from a hardline theocracy broadcasting on UK television, full of views that would destroy the very framework that allows such a channel to exist….Pim Fortuyn, you are sorely missed.
That particular comment has two excellent additional traits. One is the current right-wing bigot fad of pretending the reason they hate the darkies is because the darkies represent a threat to liberalism, exemplified precisely by Mr Fortuyn [*]; and the other is the implicit recognition that GWB is pretty much as bad as Mr Jacket…
[*] murdered by a secular white loony, lest we forget.
Update: somewhat disappointingly, the speech was nicey-nicey C-of-E moderate religiousness, rather than foam-flecked calls for the destruction of Israel and worldwide Islamic revolution. It’s almost as if the US government’s attempts to demonise Iran and its rulers ahead of their attempted war were ridiculous exaggerated bollocks, or something…
Popularity: 19% [?]
Alan ‘not the minister’ Johnson writes a puffed-up pompous piece on Iran (summary: “they’re mad bastards and they’re going to kill us all! Time to invade!) using a laboured analogy to Camus’s La Peste.
First comment:
I’ve just remembered that Camus’s most famous novel tells of a man who killed an Arab because of ‘the glare of the sun’, and then shot more bullets into his corpse.
(yes, I know Persians aren’t Arab. Fuck off…)
Popularity: 12% [?]
It’s the official and stated opinion of this blog that BNP cunts should be murdered. So obviously, on reading that BNP cunt Keith Brown had been murdered, we cracked open the champagne [*] in honour of his killer, Habib Khan.
Unfortunately, it transpired that BNP cunt Keith Brown wasn’t murdered at all – rather, Mr Khan stabbed Mr Brown after Mr Brown came to mr Khan’s house, put Mr Khan’s son in a headlock, and threatened to kill him. Now, stabbing the guy to death is certainly disproportionate at this point, but the jury agreed that it was also certainly understandable…
So regrettably, Mr Khan fails to win the halal meat, fried plantain or Polish sausage prize – that’s reserved for someone who kills a BNP cuntist on the grounds of ideology alone, not because he’s a psychotic maniac who’s threatened to kill their son.
[*] non-alcoholic, obviously, as we’re deranged terror supporting Islamist fanatics
Popularity: 12% [?]
If you’re a BNP fuckwit, you may have been spending the last year or so spreading the myth that Muslim chaps kidnap white girls and turn them into kebabs. Indeed, you may have been doing so in the comments section of this blog, citing a leak from anonymous Blackpool police sources to the local paper about an ongoing criminal investigation as their ‘evidence’.
If you’re not a BNP fuckwit, it will come as no surprise to you to learn that said ongoing criminal investigation concluded with the acquital of all defendants, ordered by the judge on the basis that the police’s evidence was riddled with lies.
Unfortunately, the story has almost certainly reached urban myth status to the degree that thick cunts everywhere will believe it happened somewhere, despite not having done. Which will almost certainly lead to more mistrust, hatred and violence between thick white cunts and the Saracen hordes. Which is what the BNP wanted in the first place… so of course they don’t give a fuck that the story was made up all along…
Update: for the avoidance of doubt, I’m happy to point out that there were no public communications made from BNP central office regarding this case. But if the people spreading the rumours weren’t BNP supporters, then mine’s a large hat doner…
Popularity: 12% [?]
As long as ignorant cunts talk this kind of shit:
Why is McDonald’s considering and even trialling Halal meat in a Christian country? I find this grossly inconsiderate to the majority of the English people who are Christian and would have issues with eating meat prepared in such a way
…I’m going to be on the side of the likes of Rowan Williams purely on an “enemy of my enemy” basis.
1) halal animals do not suffer any more than conventionally-killed animals. If you cut something’s throat with a sharp knife, it loses consciousness long before the pain from the throat wound cuts in;
2) if you give even the slightest flying fuck about animal welfare (rather than just about sticking it to the darkies), you won’t be eating at Maccy D’s anyway;
3) Jesus stated quite explicitly that Christians are not bound by dietary rules and are allowed to eat meat prepared along the lines of any other creed, Jewish or Roman. While Mohammed wasn’t about in Jesus’s day, given that halal is a toned-down version of kosher it seems unlikely that the lovey-dovey beardie chap would’ve been too grumpy about the whole thing.
If you’re a vegetarian [*], you’ve every right to criticise halal. If you only eat super-turbo-happy-meat and have got some in-depth scientific research which confirms that having your throat cut is much much worse than being shot in the head with a bolt gun, then you’ve some right to criticise halal. If you’re neither, you’ve every right to fuck off and die.
[*] perhaps “if you’re a vegetarian who doesn’t drink industrially-produced milk or eat industrially-produced cheese”: a free-range-but-halal-killed animal has a much better life and death than an industrially-farmed dairy cow.
Popularity: 7% [?]
Thoughtcrime has been decriminalised again, even for brown chaps with beards.
If you disapprove of this Out Of Touch Liberal Setting Evil Bastards Who Hate Us Free-ness, and wish that these chaps (along with anyone else who’s ever read anything you disapprove of) could be clapped right back in chokey, they you thoroughly deserve to be exploded, decapitated, gang-raped, halal-ed, and generally everything else that you’re paranoid the darkies will do to you unless we keep them under lock and key…
Popularity: 6% [?]
Which westernised country already has a parallel sharia law system in place for its Muslim minority inhabitants to use, if they so desire?
And why aren’t the likes of Melanie Phillips up in arms about said country’s craven surrender to the forces of dhimmitude and generally letting-the-side-down?
Via Dan. Relatedly, this comment is a particularly good summary of the “I am an ignorant bigot and will spout on about grand principles about which I know fuck all” school of argument:
Why can we not say definitively and without equivocation that a bed rock principle of a liberal democracy is that there is only one law and that all are subject to and equal under it?
Err, perhaps because that has never been the case anywhere, either de jure or de facto, and never will be the case anywhere? So assuming you want to accept the existence of such a thing as a liberal democracy, you’d probably best find a different bedrock…
Popularity: 11% [?]
Following medical advice, I’ve stopped reading or attempting to argue with the knuckle-dragging baboons who make up the UK’s extreme right. Therefore, I’ve managed to avoid blogger Lionheart, who posts insane lying paranoid bollocks about Teh Evil Muslim Threat.
Unfortunately, Mr Lionheart has received word from the police that he is being investigated on suspicion of incitement to racial hatred, and should report to a cop shop forthwith to discuss matters with Inspector Knacker.
This is about as strong a test of freedom of speech principles as you can imagine… on the one hand, Mr Lionheart is a bitter, twisted and deranged man who spreads poisonous lies about a minority group [*] – and indeed, a man who thinks that Muslims ought to be locked up for hate speech against non-Muslims. On the other hand, the guy is writing crap on a blog, not addressing a public meeting of violent loonies.
Overall, much as it would be gratifying to see the cunt locked up for a good long time [**], it probably behoves those of us who aren’t mad (irrespective of our political views) to oppose his arrest. After all, next time it could be someone who isn’t a poisonous evil bastard…
Update: Dsquared in the comments makes the reasonable point that in general, making false accusations of paedophilia is treated by the police as a public order offence following the News of the World riots early this decade. Since Lionheart’s blog is devoted to pretending that the main threat to our children is in being gang-raped by dark deviant brown-skinned Islamists, this sounds like a reasonable point… Lesson: defame whatever group you like online, but don’t call them a bunch of nonces.
[*] There is a very strong similarity between the kind of “they’ll sell your children into sex slavery, murder them and make them into kebabs” mythology that has become popular among BNP fringes lately, and the mythology spread about the Jews in 1800s and 1900s continental Europe. I’m not saying the Muslims in modern Britain are in the same position – but I’m definitely saying I’d put a very large bet on knowing which political party Mr Lionheart would’ve supported if he’d been in Berlin in 1933…
[**] Mr Lionheart appears to believe that “This charge if found guilty carries a lengthy prison sentence, more than what most paedophiles and rapists receive“. The maximum sentence for incitement to racial hatred is seven years; the maximum sentence for rape (including sex with a child under 13) is life; the maximum sentence for sex with a child aged 13-15 is 14 years. This would appear to suggest that Mr Lionheart is a gibbering fuckwit; a conclusion hardly at odds with the rest of the evidence…
Popularity: 100% [?]
So the poor sods who got locked up in Guantanamo for four-and-a-half years for once vaguely having looked at a chap whose brother knew an Evil Terrorist Wot Is Going To Kill Us All return, only to be arrested under the little-known No Smoke Without Fire Act 2005.
Can we not just fucking leave it out? [and yes, to you anti-Europeans: I entirely accept that the Spanish are being even worse than us on this one, and that if we didn't have European Arrest Warrants and extradition treaties then these guys would be in a better position...]
Popularity: 9% [?]