Filed under Filthy foreigners

Obituary update

If I were to say “ding dong, the witch is dead”, that might provoke unfair exciitement among my more left-of-centre readers. So I’ll stick with the news that the bigot, liar and professional Muslim-hater Oriana Fallaci has snuffed it. Good.

It’s not food, it’s sawdust

Sometimes it takes the child of a Russian dissident to point out the obvious:

There were other surprises ahead when she reached the UK… Why, when there were no food shortages, were people eating muesli?

Ooh, they’re not going to like this

Channel 4 are making a mockumentary on the aftermath of Bush’s assassination. One can only hope life imitates art.

This isn’t going to get much play from the Islamophobic crowd

Remember the terrible events in Beslan two years ago, when evil Muslim terrorists callously blew up and gunned down a school full of children after taking them hostage?

According to the Russian expert investigating the case, the explosions were all caused by Russian grenades, with the gunmen only opening fire in response to the Russian attack.

I’m sure that all those people who opined on the gunmen’s great evil at the time will now apologise…

I respect Joe Lieberman, but he’s a cock

Joe Lieberman, a Bush-loving “hey, let’s blow the shit out of the Muslims, and if you disagree with me you’re unpatriotic. Also, abortion is evil and nobody should ever do anything fun” tool who serves as an excellent example of how odd the American electoral system can be (being a Democrat) has been defeated in his Senate primary. Which is good.

Mr Lieberman has also announced his intention to stand as an independent in the actual election. Given my support of Ken Livingstone in various Mayoral elections, it would be inappropriate of me to do other than respect this decision.

However, I’d point out that when Ken stood as an independent mayoral candidate against Frank “I am a useless cunt” Dobson, there was no serious party to represent him, whereas all Joe needs to do is join the Republicans and he’ll be welcome. Indeed, if I were the Republicans in Connecticut, I wouldn’t run a candidate against Mr Lieberman. He’s guaranteed to vote with them on pretty much any issue, after all.

NB it’s worth bearing in mind that none of this battle has nothing to do with how Mr Lieberman’s Jewishness relates to the current Israeli crisis. Both American political parties show a near-fanatical support of Israel, and the vast majority even of those Americans who think the Iraq war is a Bloody Silly Idea still favour handing Israel gazillions of dollars to fight off the Evil Muslim Threat. Israel and Cuba are blind spots that liberal Americans struggle to deal sensibly with, for reasons that remain obscure.

Hooray for America!

Good news: they’re arming both sides. Now, if only they’d give Hizbollah $5 billion a year in aid as well, there’d be some kind of level killing field.

And under Batista, the whores were far cheaper

It’s brave of Nick Cohen and Norm Geras to try and come to an understanding of the common ground that unites us all with the equally pro-war types at Front Page Magazine. Brave like the Charge of the Light Brigade. It almost makes you feel sorry for the boys.

The piece also contains one of those bits of American Right Bizarre Association that makes you double-take:

The Left has a long, depressing, ugly and blood-stained record of worshipping the most vile and barbaric tyrannies of the 20th century, including Stalin’s Soviet Union, Mao’s China, Ho Chi Minh’s Vietnam and Castro’s Cuba.

Nobody could dispute Stalin, Mao or Minh as Utter Cunts Of The 20th Century. But what the fuck is Fidel doing on the list? At worst, he’s slightly less bad than most of the tin-pot dictators who’ve cheated, murdered and bullied their way to power in Latin America over the last 100 years – the only difference is that all the other bastards are entirely discredited and hated, while Castro is still popular-ish among his own people, for all his undeniable faults.

Yeah, I know the actual reason: Casto set Cuba’s mentally ill and sexually deviant population adrift on boats to Miami in the early 1980s, ensuring that Florida is now full of crack-addled Republican-voting perverts who hate Castro almost as much as they hate each other, and right-wing Americans have to pretend to like at least some spics to avoid electoral oblivion. This doesn’t make the conjecture any less insane.

Perspective #2

PDF: “You do loads of business in the States, aren’t you worried about the fact they’ve started jailing British businessmen on the slightest pretext?”

Another Friend Of PDF: “What, you mean NatWest and BetOnSports? Not really, it’s about the same odds as being blown up by terrorists, and I’m not worried about that.”

PDF: “Christ, good point - of course, the Brits who died on September 11 were all in the WTC on business, weren’t they?”

AFOP: “I hadn’t even thought of that, but you’re right. So it’s a 10:1 terrorist:random jail ratio, and we’re not afraid of the terrorists either, so obviously being afraid of random jail would be silly.”

PDF: “Indeed. So why the hell does the second scare me so much more than the first?”

AFOP: “Probably because you’re a cock.”

Quid pro quo

“If you stop being so… well… black, we’ll stop hating you”, say the Republicans to the NAACP. Some (paid-by-Murdoch) writers think they should hate them anyway.

Publishing excerpts from horrible loons is too easy

…but nonetheless amusing:

This Islam Expo event is nothing more than a revival meeting for Lucifer. They won’t tell you that since they are deceived and don’t know it; so you won’t see any banners hailing Satan, but you might see banners hailing Allah. And that is not far off the mark.

A revival meeting for Lucifer sounds far more fun than a well-meaning but tedious procession of worthies. I can see why the LGF lot need to invent this rubbish – such delusions must make their lives more interesting. See also Mel P (shit, I lost the game).