Pigdogfucker

(via)

I’m not a criminologist. However, if it transpires that the unfortunate French chaps who were savagely murdered in New Cross last weekend were killed as part of a burglary, then I’ll happily suck my own balls.

Even among raving loonies, that level of ultraviolence (not just murder, but this kind of murder) is reserved for people you properly hate, not people whose PlayStation you’re trying to nick. It’ll be mistaken identity or nefarious double life, mark my words…

Update: yeah, they were stabbed 240 times for their PIN codes. Right, that’ll be it; seriously, don’t Telegraph writers have any common sense filter AT ALL?

Also from that piece, while it’s understandable that one of the students’ relatives isn’t thinking straight right now, it’s still a shame that he’s fallen for the “London is a dangerous city compared to Paris or New York” bullshit. It isn’t; and – even if these guys transpire to be incredibly unlucky exceptions – nearly everyone who dies a violent death here still brought it on themselves (see also: 16-year-olds who start knife fights…)

If you follow Russian business, you’ll know that the despicable bastards who run Russia are currently in the process of stealing any vaguely oil-or-gas related assets from Western investors – currently, some crooks are trying to nick BP’s Russian subsidiary; last year, the government successfully nicked Shell’s Sakhalin 2 oil field.

Unrelatedly, a grumpy old sod got fired from Shell in the early 1990s and proceeded to sue them. The litigation was settled out of court without anyone admitting anything much, in the way that these things usually are – however, the grumpy old sod in question decided the best use of his now-copious spare time would be to launch a site devoted to hating Shell. Which he duly did. And subsequently, the Russian government’s ropey-as-hell attempts to take over Sakhalin (oh noes! environmental regulations fail!) relied on misleading documents posted on said grumpy old sod’s website.

So I hope the grumpy old sod in question lives long enough to be one of the first to freeze to death when the Russians jack up gas prices to $100 per million BTU…

[digresionally, I fucking hate it when non-cave-dwelling non-hippies slate oilcos for ‘environmental damage’. If you drive a car or use electricity, you have no fucking right whatsoever to criticise the actions of the oil majors; the problem is you not them.]