Posted in 2007

Why are Europhobics such lying fuckwits?

Europhobic blogger Prodicus has a heartfelt rant on the EU treaty. He thinks we need a referendum on it, even though we don\’t normally have referenda in our political system.

The reason why he claims to think this is dressed up in paragraphs of elegant and enraged piffle – but in short, he says that the current treaty represents Parliament permanently and irrevocably giving up our sovereignty to the EU.

Only one problem: this is complete and utter bollocks. Any British parliament convened at any future event can vote – on a simple majority – to revoke the treaty and withdraw from the EU. If UKIP were elected next Tuesday, they could have us out of the EU by Wednesday (obviously the administrative tasks of deporting the foreigners, dealing with retirees evicted from Spain, abolishing human rights, losing our entire financial services industry to Frankfurt and so on would take longer, but the admin\’s always a killer…). The same will be true once the new treaty is in force: we do not have to follow the treaty for one second longer than Parliament deems it appropriate for us to do so.

Why the fuck do the likes of Prodicus perpetually spread the lie that the EU, and not Parliament, has the ultimate power? Is it, err, because they don\’t actually have any sane grounds to oppose the EU so need to make shit up…?

Ffwrch Cymraeg

The BBC has a piece on its website on the impact of the Welsh language in Wales and the tensions between native and \’cultural\’ Welsh speakers, following its bizarre but entertaining resurgence. Now, just as I approve of the study of Anglo-Saxon and Etruscan, I approve of the study of Welsh.

However, contrary to many of the opinions expressed in the article, Welsh is not in a meaningful historic sense the national language of Wales (any more than ancient Briton is the national language of England): aside from a few inbred hillbillies in the furthest-flung corners, the modern-day Welsh are descended from people who\’ve been speaking English and its precursors since well before they even reached western Britain.

South Wales, culturally, is English-speaking, industrialised, working-class and Methodist (not coincidentally, a bit like Birmingham); north-east Wales is a holiday resort for Scousers, West Wales is the terrifying backwoods with almost no inhabitants; and the borders are England (has anyone ever encountered a less Welsh town than Wrexham anywhere ever?). The Welsh language is only of any historical import to the West Welsh; for people in Newport or Cardiff to learn it conversationally is just as wanky as 1920s public schoolboys conversing in Latin…

[disclaimer: PDF is half-Welsh, and his fathers are welcome to it]

Obligatory rugby post

Yes, Stuart Dickinson is an embittered, cheating lying Aussie cunt who should be burned on the same pyre as Luis Medina Cantalejo, and rugby refereeing chief Paddy O\’Brien should be sacked on the spot for giving the despicable bastard his support.

Nonetheless, England played badly and in no sense deserved to win. We are not the second-best rugby team in the world, and only a raving loony would believe otherwise; overall, we should be bloody pleased we got through to the final…

This may be the finest dissection of human relationships ever

Noreen at Emerald Bile. Read the whole thing…

Once he has cleared off, the wife will be stuck in the arse of the country with kids she didn\’t actually want, and the man will feel slighted that, by doing the right thing, he actually did the wrong thing, but still out of bloody mindedness and a desperation to prove that he was right after all, will then proceed to ruin the life of his second wife…

In which society takes another step back to the Dark Ages

So we lock up more children than more or less anywhere else civilised (note: for crime-\’n\’-punishment purposes, the US does not count as civilised). But apparently that isn\’t good enough – we also need to hit them with big sticks.

The most appalling thing of all is that this is being proposed in the name of saving prison officers from injury. Bollocks to that. Prison officers are, without exception, despicable evil stupid cunts, just as bad as the people they look after, so I have not even the slightest academic interest in their welfare.
Anyway, if they can\’t deal with unruly children without provoking assault, then they thoroughly deserve all the \”broken noses, compressed fractures of cheekbones, fractured eye sockets, ears being bitten off, pens being shoved through people\’s faces, [and] slashes\” they get.

Burn Luis Medina Cantalejo alive

Yes, it\’s only the second most important form of football; yes, England played badly while Russia played surprisingly well; and yes, if Israel beats Russia then we\’re not necessarily out of the contest (the latter would also be quite funny).

Nonetheless, the game was actually a draw; the penalty was not a penalty; Luis Medina Cantalejo is a despicable cunt and if someone were to burn him alive shortly after raping his wife and eviscerating his children in front of him, that would be fair enough. Fucking cheating Spic bastard; I wonder how much the assorted Russian oligarchs bribed him?
(also, anyone who blames Rooney deserves glassed. It was unequivocally not a fucking penalty; it wasn\’t really even a foul…)

If you were looking for a definition of \’self-righteous, self-justifying cunts\’…

Bystander, the blogging magistrate, has rightly mocked a pro-speeding website\’s insane reaction to losing in the ECHR (summary: if your car\’s caught speeding, you have to say who was driving or why you don\’t know who was driving, otherwise you\’re considered liable for the fine and points. Loonies believe this is an Evil Violation of Human Rights, despite generally supporting the internment and execution of brown chaps).

The sheer level of affronted cuntery that this has met in his comments section is highly entertaining.

Look, you badly-driving bastards (it doesn\’t matter whether the speed limit is appropriate to the road, if you\’re not capable of driving within it because it\’s the law then you shouldn\’t be allowed behind the wheel), you do more fucking harm per year than the fucking terrorists by several orders of magnitude, and are treated with fucking kid gloves [*]. Take your points and be grateful for them, cuntwits.

[*] unless you\’re unlucky enough to actually kill someone while driving badly, at which point you become an Evil Bastard and go to jail forever despite having no more culpability than every other badly-driving cunt on the road

Things I missed

One of the most shit excuses I\’ve ever heard for not updating a blog is that the blogger\’s flatmates brother is currently squatting in the blogger-in-question\’s computer room. But fuck you all, it\’s true. Both directly, and by impairing my porn consumption and hence diminishing my anger.

Craig Murray\’s Dundee University rectorship speech is excellent, especially \”Jack Straw, incidentally, is a man who should have \’Rubbish\’ shouted at him from the moment he steps out of the shower in the morning until the moment he retires with his evening cocoa\”. And the case where a court ruled that only someone of unsound mind would consider donating money to the Tories was, if anything, even better.

Possibly fast, definitely shit

I had chalked UK ISP Fasthosts down as a company that cravenly but understandably backed down to Alisher Usmanov, and that might have learned lessons from that debacle.

But in fact, it turns out that they\’re just a bunch of cunts who\’ll pull your website for no good reason, without checking whether any claims made against it are actually true. Not even true in the \”is that thing he said libellous?\” sense, but in the \”does he actually have a link going there?\” sense.

If you use them, don\’t. If you\’re thinking of setting up a website with them, don\’t. If you\’re thinking of setting up any kind of content-based website in the UK, unless you absolutely need it to be UK-based for legal reasons, don\’t. Not all UK ISPs are cunts like Fasthosts, but they\’re all subject to [*] UK libel law – and at current dollar rates, US ones are cheaper anyway.

Update: and they lose your email
[*] yes, I know everyone on the Internet is subject to UK libel law, but US ISPs tend to either have no assets in the UK and therefore not give a fuck, or be very big and therefore slightly less scared of Fancy Lawyers.

Under no circumstances…

I can\’t stress the extent to which nobody, under any circumstances, should ever watch this video. NSFW, or indeed anywhere else.