Pigdogfucker

Like News Of The World readers, ants have an internal pedometer.

Rounding up a bunch of swarthy-looking chaps who’ve done nothing wrong, letting dodgy third-world jailers torture them, then sending them to a camp in Cuba forever is still viewed as perfectly legitimate. But at least George Bush isn’t allowed to invent secret extrajudicial tribunals to ‘try’ them for their horrible, imaginary crimes…

Jamie K seems to have acquired illicit access to internal police intelligence covering the next terror raid:

A man with a barely functioning lizard brain tells the cops that a cobalt bomb is being made over a baby belling in a bedsit. This time 500 cops turn up, along with the Metropolitan Police brass band and a bunch of tea ladies from the staff canteen. The entire population of the neighbourhood is killed, smashed to ashes, freeze dried and sent into geostationary orbit around Mars. Later on, a senior officer issues an apology. Newspaper columnists of the bedwetting type set their jaws and affirm that it’s all very well criticising the police, but things like this have to be tolerated if the worst is not to happen.

You can now be sent off to one of the world’s most notorious human-rights-abusing powers and tried in front of a highly partisan jury on the basis of no evidence whatsoever, all for sitting at your desk in the UK and doing your job.

Whether or not the NatWest Three are guilty is entirely irrelevant. If they defrauded anyone, it was NatWest; NatWest was and remains a British company; its past and present owners have no interest in prosecuting them or desire to prosecute them; and all the relevant transactions they’re accused of making were conducted in London. If you support their extradition to the undeniable hellhole that is Texas, you deserve no human rights of your own whatsoever.

And the fact that everyone who lost money on Enron, as in almost every financial scandal ever, was a greedy thick fuck who thoroughly deserved to lose every penny isn’t even relevant to any of the above.

Some terrorists capture one single foreign soldier. That soldier’s country responds by invading and killing everyone in sight in the vague hope of retrieving him. They bomb the fuck out of bridges and power stations, presumably just in case he’s being hidden there. What does this say about the character of the people running the soldier’s country?

In some ways, it’s sad that the Palestinians have agreed to tolerate Israel’s existence...

I always had my suspicions about David from A Tangled Web. Comments thread, reproduced without any edits:

Hitler was a Christian and believed the Final Solution was ‘the Lord’s Work’ – saying he was anti-christian is a lie.

Hitler was the embodiment of what a disciple of Luther can aspire to be – i presume you have read Mein Kampf, right?

Posted by: nutjack | June 26, 2006 at 09:28 AM

Just to say that I’ve read it and it’s a great read. Melanie is one of our finest writers and yet, her own paper, the allegedly “right wing” Dhimmi Mail, has chosen NOT to serialise it. Shameful. 

Posted by: David Vance | June 26, 2006 at 11:25 AM

I’d agree that Hitler and Phillips are fairly similar, and that the Daily Wail is slightly to the left of either. I’m not quite so sure that this is a good thing, nor that Mein Londonistan by Adolf Phillips is genuinely a great read.

...but nonetheless amusing:

This Islam Expo event is nothing more than a revival meeting for Lucifer. They won’t tell you that since they are deceived and don’t know it; so you won’t see any banners hailing Satan, but you might see banners hailing Allah. And that is not far off the mark.

A revival meeting for Lucifer sounds far more fun than a well-meaning but tedious procession of worthies. I can see why the LGF lot need to invent this rubbish – such delusions must make their lives more interesting. See also Mel P (shit, I lost the game).

In a pleasant change from being shot with American-made artillery shells while only having sticks and stones to defend themselves, the Palestinians have (at least, so they claim) developed chemical and biological weapons.

I’d recommend a focus on poison gas, if only because it would provoke the funniest reactions on LGF. My tenner’s on “It’s a new Holocaust and the Palis are the new Nazis, therefore we need to fight a new WWII until they’re all dead like Hitler”.

Update: “jihad-genocide” just on the news of the threat. We have a winner…

The articulate-but-paranoid EU Referendum bloggers believe that the battle for UK independence is already lost. In particular:

Thus, we have a choice between “democracy” and “stability”, the choice between supporting – and occasionally leading – campaigns and initiatives alongside the United States and its allies, or supporting the foreign policy initiatives of the European Union and its allies. And, as it stands, we are sliding towards the latter, in a contest between two incompatible world visions.

In other words, we’re going to stop getting involved with mad interventions that don’t help anyone but make everyone hate us, and instead join the rest of Europe in not wasting money, time and lives on pointless crusades. Yay.

EU Referendum don’t think this would be a good outcome, for reasons that are unclear. Luckily, they have a solution:

[P]ursue a campaign for a more active, effective and longer-term engagement in Iraq, staying there until we have a fully-functioning, liberal democracy.

And for my next trick - porcine aviation! 

“My hats off to Melanie Phillips. She is our Oriana Fallaci, it seems”. – commenter Nick223 at CommentIsFree.